hello my bittersweet blog

Been a while…yeah I know and you know that I am not that busy, just lazy. I would trade anything just so I can have a better sleep and besides you (my blog) and Dot have to rest as well 😀

Don’t you just love the cuddle weather?

Oh well, it’s a good thing that Pedring (storm) is almost out but I heard there’s a new storm coming. This is the reason why I have been so lazy,love the cold weather…

I have listed a lot of possible things that I can blog about and believe it or not when I’m writing those stuff I was super excited, but you know I prefer my entries to have pictures on it, so I was gathering some pictures but WTH it’s taking me forever!!!

I think not having pictures on some of my post is not a bad idea at all, so I’m making one now.

But honestly I don’t want to start blogging about those stuff yet, as you know I think a lot sometimes, there are so many things going on in my head right now and I can’t think straight. I’m afraid that I would say something not cool.

But this is my blog, I can say whatever I want and the hell I care if some people thinks it’s not cool.

Ok, I don’t want my right and left brain to start arguing about blogging, so I might as well stop right now, before this gets out of control. I still have work tonight so I need to get my daily dose of “good sleep”, not sure when I can come back to spend time with you  “my blog” since we will go home to Pangasinan and spend the weekends with Lolo,Lola and my cousins again – yay! I am super excited about this!

ciao!

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Get It Right

What can you do when your good isn’t good enough
And all that you touch tumbles down?
‘Cause my best intentions
Keep making a mess of things,
I just wanna fix it somehow
But how many times will it take?
Oh, how many times will it take for me to get it right, to get it right?

– Get It Right – Glee Cast

I was in a meeting earlier and the song just started playing in my head when someone is explaining something…I don’t mean to not to listen to her but with all honesty I was having a bit of a hard time understanding her, let’s just say that that  person’s communication skills is a bit “challenged” compared to mine – not trying to be mean either I just couldn’t find of a better way of saying it.

But somehow I understand where she’s coming from, she feels like she’s a victim of some sort and my friend is right, you wouldn’t be a victim if you haven’t allowed yourself to be a victim of a situation that you can actually avoid.

I felt the same way, not so long ago. And I wish I could tell what changed my mind or my attitude towards the situation. I just woke up one day and realized that if I want to succeed I should know how to motivate myself…

I’ve said this before, my success and my happiness should not depend on someone / anyone else.

People can say a lot of nasty stuff about you and you can’t stop them from doing it, unless you prove them wrong.

Get things right for yourself, not to please anyone else. You will feel more full-filled by doing so.

That’s just one of the lessons in life I learned recently. I’ve been pretty optimistic like most of the time, but when the “negastar attitude” hits me,  it sucks!

So it’s always nice to surround yourself with people that knows how to motivate themselves and can teach you how to motivate yourself and maintain a positive attitude for almost everything – but then, really have to be careful about some people…because some people will motivate you just for the heck of doing it, they will do it because they will also benefit from it – Genuine Motivation people!

There are moments that you would actually feel that your good is not good enough, blame it on change, because just when you thought that you’ve done something great…here comes “change” and poof the whole world means something else again…so you’re left thinking what else you could have done?

 But this shouldn’t stop you from moving forward – it could hurt you, but never let it break you.

— I don’t think I’m making any sense here. ha ha.

A few announcements, I guess to re-vamp my blogging style , whenever I would blog I would make a list of the bittersweet stuff that happened that I could remember and I might start a blog challenge anytime soon. Let me start the bittersweet stuff today.

Bitters:
– I’m sick,my throat is so freaking itchy and my cough is really killing me – sooooooo hate being sick!
– another night with the creepiest driver ever!
– i thought our new nurse is cute,but I think he’s gay.
– not able to eat donut (courtesy of our AVP) because of my effin cough!
– my mouse is broken! 

Sweets:
– downloaded Kurt’s version of Defying Gravity (Glee), I like Kurt!
– nice lunch at work! teehihi ♥ and at home too!
– the other guy expressed some concern, checking if I’m feeling well.
– will get 7 hours of sleep tonight!
– I’m not the only one sick in our team, yay! I’m not alone.
– someone else made me smile today 


*notes to self: don’t put too much meaning on it, wait till tomorrow 
ok, off to bed now! ciao!

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New Bag! Yey!

Courtesy of course by Mother dear 🙂

She knows that I always wanted to have a Michaela bag, I don’t effin know why but whenever we go to the mall I always check the “Michaela” place.  Told ya the name got an effin jinx, it has a freaking spell… I’m attracted to it! chos!

She bought this last friday, while having lunch she told me that it’s supposed to be my birthday present , but I got way too excited and asked her to give it to me so I can use it. Apparently, she bought one for my sister too, since her birthday will be in November. Mum, asked me to choose what I like he he but I know my sister will pick the lavender one, so I got the black one 🙂

I soooooo love it! So many pockets – yeah this morning, on my way home I was looking for my p15.00, kasi nalimutan ko kang saang bulsa ko siya nailagay. LOL!

I carry a lot of stuff so it’s nice to have this kind of bag, it looks small but got a huge space inside.

→ Walang basagan ng trip, feel ko magmodel modelan! 😀

→ well, as you can see, that’s my Mum’s altar on my back, she is a very religious person. Family picture and my baby picture on the wall.

→ with Mum and my cousin

→ With my sister’s Lavender bag.

→ Lalayne’s  , Lavender bag,it is definitely bigger than mine.

→ My bag.

Thanks Mum! This is now included on my “things to be happy list”.

Time for me to go to bed 🙂 ciao!

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Happy Grandparent’s Day ♥

 Greetings to all the grandparents in the universe!

People meet my Lolo and Lola.

→ I took a picture of their wedding photo, but it was placed on the highest part of their house that I have to stand on a chair to take this pic.

→ This is better compared to the 1st photo.Lola got a pretty nice wedding dress. She’s really beautiful and Lolo is soooo handsome.

It’s always nice to see their wedding picture up on the wall every time we go home to Pangasinan.After all these years.Lola told me a few stories during their younger years and I can only imagine how they used to hide away from those Spaniards – wait, was it the Spanish or Japanese?

→ Grandfather & Grandmother, after almost 55 years of marriage (and counting). Not even once I heard any story that one of them cheated, Lola can be such a nagger sometimes but Lolo loves her no matter she says.

→ Miss you…and will always love you! Can’t wait to spend another “grand vacation” with you guys.

† Remembering also today is the 9/11 tragedy.

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Hello September

I know it’s the 6th already but it’s not that late to welcome September, oh please be good to me. It’s amazing how time seems to fly,last week I was so worried about the deadline but jeeez it is September for Pete’s sake I’m still not over the issue.

I’m still on vacation mode though, on leave until Wednesday night. And I’ve been thinking so much lately ( or maybe not ) that I feel like I have never been this so unproductive in my life – I cleaned my room, I plan to do the laundry by tomorrow, I wash the dishes, spend time with my Mum watching DVDs or the late night shows but no sense of fulfillment. I don’t know what to do with my life and I’m turning 26 in 3 months and I still haven’t figured out what I want, well I know some of the things I want but those are temporary stuffs.

Oh well, enough of the meaningless drama in my life.Why not blog about the movies I’ve seen so far for the last 3 days, my sister and her partner got a huge collection of DVDs.

Last Saturday I saw Snakes On Plane starring Samuel L. Jackson, pretty scary, I don’t like snakes. I had a chance to touch a snake when we went to Manila Zoo few years ago, ohmeegosh it’s soooooooo effin big and cold. My grandma had it on her shoulders, oh boy, she was scared but laughing at the same time.  But the movie is great, I like it…cute guy surfing, ha ha.Oh,he’s surfing without snakes brother, ok? I always like surfing, it looks easy but I know its difficult especially for people like me, born in the city soooooo far away from the ocean.

Right after that movie I watched Gulliver’s Travel, as expected Jack Black is funny, though I’m not really a huge fan of the guy , don’t like him the way I like Adam Sandler but he’s good in being funny. The story of the Bermuda Triangle has always left me so curious, I’ve seen some documentary shows about it from Discovery or maybe Nat Geo, it’s just weird that a place like that exist, and what if there’s a real Island of Lilliput? But I wont dare to go there just to prove it.No way!

The 3rd movie and I watched this last Sunday is Chain Letter, starring Nikki Reed.Oh jeez this is so gross. If you’ve seen the Saw Series and Final Destination Series this is just like those movies.Gruesome.It’s a movie about anti-technology, the killer(s) are anti-tech but it’s weird because they use technology to find their victims.They will send a chain letter and if you wont pass it on and just delete it they will come and kill you using chains. Yikes! I think the movie was created because people are so hooked on using mobile phones, internet, video games and the likes.

Yesterday we watched Unknown starring Liam Neeson. Good movie, different twist on the story but I think I’ve seen something like that, or maybe it looks like it because it’s about “memory loss” or something, if it does make any sense.

My sister likes to watch Ghost Whisperer , Jennifer Love Hewitt’s TV show. I think I kinda like it too, at first I thought it was something really really scary that wont make me go to sleep at night but it is a good show, she helps the ghosts to do what they need to do , you know what they say that they have unfinished businesses. Jen helps them in doing that so they can see the light. It’s a nice show.

Aside from DVD marathon everyday , I also love watching shows on ETC. I think I mentioned this before that I like watching Glee now, One Tree Hill, Pretty Little Liars, The Glee Project and I hope I get to watch Gossip Girl too, I miss watching Chuck and Blair.

I’m also reading an Oracle Book right now and I have asked my sister to download some of Anne Rice’s works for me, she’s been talking about Percy Jackson for about a month now and doesn’t interest me at all. I don’t know why.

Later today I guess I’ll watch Just go with it and/or Blue Valentine.

Tomorrow might download a few pictures.

Just a thought, from http://uncomfortablesoul.tumblr.com/

I was checking her blog ( and I’d say it’s pretty amazing, because I can relate to most of her entries) read this and it is so true! Been single since 2008, I dated a few guys but that’s just it. I may seem a little troubled lately but nothing serious I guess.
I admit that I miss that feeling. The feeling of having someone special in your life and you’re also special to them. The nights just seems so cold no matter how warm the weather is.

Why don’t you just get over here and make me happy just like what you told me the lats time we talked? You know who you are. It’s just weird that after how many months of no communication you’ll just send me a message and here I am again, missing you like crazy – please if you really don’t want to be with me then just _____,it hurts knowing that you like me and you know that the feeling is mutual and yet we’re like this…and I have to hurt someone else just so that I wont think of you.

I have been waiting for you…all these time.

September…have to start my wishlist for Christmas (LOL), list of gifts for mygodchildren ( if I wont be too lazy to give it to them ) , yeah I guess prepare as early as today for Christmas.

Please be good to me September.

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Reality Bites

and it hurts pretty bad. But sometimes we get hurt for a good reason, right?

Bittersweet Joyce is back online, I know I’ve been out for a while…got a lot of “contemplating moments” and I feel like my brain cells are shrinking – of course I’m exaggerating! Or maybe I have a broken logic bone too…

The last few weeks I should say was somewhat dramatic, proof of that is my previous entry, I admit that my emotions got so mixed up and for a moment there I feel like I’m really lost. It was a pretty good turning point in my life, I know this doesn’t happen all the time but I’m thankful that it did.

Here’s a list of the bittersweet truths I realized so far…

1. It’s always better to keep my mouth shut if I haven’t figured out the right things to say – but this is not applicable all the time, there’s always a “right timing” for everything.

2. If I have a problem with someone and I don’t feel like talking to that person to resolve the issue, it’s always a good idea to talk to someone who knows me too well and the other person – the 3rd party can look in to both sides of the story and can make me realize if I’m wrong or right.

3. I can’t trust anyone I consider as a friend – I have no idea how long have I had this attitude that I categorize my friends according to their personality (sounds weird). Like 1 friend is for laughing moments, 1 friend for gossip moments, 1 friend for movie / music stuff, 1 friend for kikay stuff, 1 friend for keeping my secrets, 1 friend that could teach me anything I need to know about life, 1 friend as my eating buddy and the likes. All of these category can be applied to 1 person, but not to all of my friends. Its better to have only a few people who can be all of these type of friend in just 1 person – you get what I mean right?

4. I may be out of focus sometimes, so I need to constantly remind myself of the things that I need to do and how to do it.

5. I can be so impulsive – grrrr!

6. My happiness, my success does not and should not depend on anyone – during those moments that I feel like I’m lost, I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t care about the things that I’m doing. I didn’t know how to motivate myself. I didn’t know how to  pull myself up , it felt like I’m  6 ft. underground and the hands that used to hold me is nowhere to be found – yeah I know it sounds dramatic but that’s the bittersweet truth. Until 1 day I realized that I have to pull myself together if I want to succeed, I found happiness from the strangest places on earth and the negative comments should not affect me at all.

I know what I want, I know what I need…somehow I know how to get them, I ask for help whenever it’s necessary, I ask for opinions to help me make a decision but I don’t think I will ever need someone to decide for me.Unless you’re God.

some tumblr stuff that inspired me 🙂

→ this is true!

→ this is a nice list!

→ Amen!

I’m glad that my Mum  is always here to support me.I couldn’t thank God enough for giving me such an amazing Mum.

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